January 31, 2006

File This One Under "WTF????"

I know I could go on some diatribe about Sam "Borkeamada" Alito's confrmation and how pussified the Democrats are, but instead I'd rather wallow in THE DUNGEON.

Seriously, the Dedham, Massachusetts prosecutor thought he'd get an easy conviction against a dominatrix whose slave died during a session. What a fucking putz.

First off, although I'm not in that lifestyle I do understand a few things:

1. The guy was paying her to beat him.
2. His heart attack had little if anything to do with her beating him.
3. Being a professional dominatrix is not the same as being a prostitute.
4. BDSM does not as a general rule involve sex.
5. Most people are not so open to the idea of paying cold hard cash to someone in leather thigh high boots to spank their ass bloody with a leather strap.
6. People into the "lifestyle" aren't exactly public about it.
7. DA's are shameless schmucks who are beholden to the almighty election and will do anything for free publicity even if it means DONNING A LEATHER HOOD IN OPEN COURT AND DEMONSTRATING HOW THE DECEASED WAS BEATEN.

I think the prosecutor had a chubby when he was doing that. I don't think he took this guy's death seriously and he used it as a reelction platform. Luckily, the jury pushed the DA off into oncoming subway traffic before he could ruin the dom's life. Good for them.

The best part of this fucked up story is that the DA tried this case with an alleged confession from the defendant that wasn't recorded nor written down, there were no investgators' notes, there was no body, no blood, no DNA, no weapon and no witnesses. Nothing. Nada. Zilch. Zero.

Sounds like the DA just wanted an excuse to play dress up publicly. I wonder if this judge had a penis pump too....

January 27, 2006

The Greenberg Traurig "Payola" and Dubya- The Jack Connection

I started this yesterday and have tried to get some better bloggers than myself to raise this torch but with no luck. Here goes:

1. Jack Abramoff was part of the Bush Transition team for the Department of the Interior. The same department that oversees tribal gaming.

2. Jack leaves the Bush transition team to work for the law firm Greenberg Traurig in January 2001.

3. Greenberg Traurig had just devoted major resources to the Bush Campaign in the Florida Recount.

4. The Bush campaign ran up a major league legal bill which has still not been fully paid.

5. According to my research at least $314,000 is still unpaid at this time, but GT's income has more than quadrupled.

6. Jack's work for GT involved Indian tribes and its that "work" that has led to his guilty pleas in bilking the tribes of millions upon millions of dollars.

7. Jack's best friend at his former lobbying firm Preston, Gates & Ellis was David Safavian who was arrested in September '05 for corruption charges related to his job as the head of government procurement for the General Services Administration. Notably, Safavian's appointment by Bush had at one time been held up by Bob Byrd whom I bitch about below.

8. Jack and David worked on the Northern Mariana Islands bit with Tom DeLay which resulted in an ill-timed criminal investigation which was halted only after the US Attorney was demoted. Curiously, this happened right after US Attorney Black sent a subpoena inquiring into some of Abramoff and DeLay's dealings on the islands.

9. In 1997, then Governor of Texas George Bush wrote a letter on behalf of Jack's client the Commonwealth of NMI. Jack billed the Commonwealth for Bush's letter.

10. Jack's assistant, Susan Ralston, went to work for Karl Rove. She's been subpoenaed in the Plamegate- CIA Leak case.

See, these are just part of the links between Bush and Jack, so it is complete and utter bullshit that Bush says there's no story. It's also hogwash that Dubya gave back only 6K of money he claims was connected to Jack. So far, the tab is over half a million bucks. 100K pioneer status in both elections plus the 300+K from GT in inkind donations of legal services. It sounds like payola to me.

If I were David Gregory I'd start looking for photos from the Texas governor's mansion and FOIA the call logs while Bush was governor. There's some serious shit there I'd bet.

I Normally Just Go To Sleep....

Researchers are now saying having sex before public speaking calms nerves. Shit, I just normally fall asleep.

Maybe it works too well for some of us.

January 26, 2006

Hey Bob Byrd, Shit or Get off the Pot

I was checking the latest status of the Alito confirmation hearings (Kerry wants a fillibuster and some Dems are turncoats). I saw on thing that really chapped my hide- Senator Robert C. Byrd of West Virginia, a friggin' Democrat, is supporting Sam "Borkeamada" Alito for Sandra Day O'Connor's seat. WTF???

Did Byrd forget that Sam Alito doesn't support miner's rights? Did Byrd forget he's in a reelection battle in a state that has not once but twice in the last three weeks suffered the loss of its miners due to safety issues? The same safety issues, Borkeamada thinks are too unworthy for serious thought and attention?

If Byrd, doesn't see the correlation there, then he needs to retire. Obviously, his advanced age is getting to him. He needs to shit or get of the pot.

PS- I called his office to ask what was up with his support of Borkeamada. It took me three tries and when I did get through (voicemail was full) and there was a party going on in the background. The girl answering the phone was barely listening to me, referred me to a website for Byrd's "view." It did nothing more than say, some people thought Teddy Kennedy was mean to the big liar and I feel bad about it, so I'll vote for him. Maybe his wife will stop boohooing for the camera's now.

If I were a Senator and my staff was half-boozed up in the middle of the day having a very loud party while business wasn't being conducted, I'd fucking fire some sorry sons of bitches. Instead, I doubt he's aware of it. Maybe they turned down his hearing aid or it's his naptime.

More on the Bush-Jackoff Relationship

A few blogs I visit daily have been commenting on the Bush-Jackoff photos and their relevance today. They make the point that Dubya's protestations this A.M. about when he'd release the fabled photos were a bit much. If Bush is telling the truth (Seriously, would that weasel even know what the truth is? Even if it was a ping pong ball shooting out of his greasy snatch?) in that the photos are irrelevant, then why has the hosting site taken them down at the White House's request?

I started hand-searching the website's cached areas and haven't hit anything yet, but I know there will be something out there in this age of technology. Those photos will go live one day soon, and then Bush will hate saying it's irrelevant all the while having his office hide it. Their actions belie their words. It's relevant for some reason. Maybe the photographer accidentally included the tube of KY in the shot....

Oh, BTW- just in case you didn't remember- The Bush vs. Gore election battle was very expensive. Jackoff worked for the firm Greenberg Taurig. That particular firm worked on the court battle over the Florida recounts. In the end, they forgave over $314,000 in legal bills incurred by the George W. Bush Campaign. Doesn't that make more of a difference than the 6 or 8K that Bush says Abramoff gave in him campaign donations????

I'd fuckin' say.

January 24, 2006

Why Jack Abramoff is Invited to the Circle Jerk, But Not the Prom

I know it's been a while, but shit- I have a life and unfortunately I haven't had DSL at my ofice since the cheap ass wanker known as Larry Stewart moved out and fucked all of us here in the office. All the fucker had to do is tell the truth and do it with two weeks notice instead of two days notice. From this point forward, he will be on my eternal shit list. May his wife catch him bed with a Vietnamese prostitute while he has a tennis racquet stuck up his ass....

So, back to Jack.... Jack's daddy's a bit pissed at George "Whattahunkovman" Clooney for making masturbation jokes during last week's Golden Globes presentation. Big deal. No one listens to George anyway. We're too busy drooling (straight guys alike). And now, TIME is saying they've seen five different photos of Bush meeting with Jackoff after Scotty Boy said there was nothing to the rumors of Jackoff and Bush having their own Brokeback Mountain moments in front of the camera. Well, lordy, lordy. I guess they left Scotty Boy outta the loop on the family photo-op stuff yet gain.

I can see why Bushie is acting like he doesn't know Jack. Jack's going to the federal pen. Jack's greed got him in bed with the mob, and his...ahem...relationships with certain powerful congressmen will cost many people their jobs and the GOP their fundraising superpowers and probably give Congress back to the Dems in the '06 midterm elections. Bush has enough problems right now, but five years ago, that wasn't the case and everyone was "chummy."

Now when I say "chummy" I mean chummy in the way one acts towards the guy who gave him a handjob at band camp, but that he wouldn't even say "yo" to at the junior prom. Sure, Jackoff was a Bush Pioneer having raised over 100K for Bush's election efforts in 2000 and 2004. And sure, Jackoff put a lot of money on the table for many powerful Congressmen. And sure, Jack got some return lip service from Bush and others on behalf of his clients back then, but he let his ego get in the way. He got cocky and he did a really poor off-off-off K Street version of Icarus. It's the difference between confidence and being a slimy dick.

Jackoff is the creepy drug dealer you cozy up to at the backwall of a dark party hoping to get a stray toke or bump from, but by the light of day, you won't acknowledge who he is. To do so would to embarass yourself or to seem too lowbrow. Jackoff is the waitress at your dad's diner who sucks your dick in the storage closet. Jackoff is the cheap blonde dancer whom you knock up in the Poconos on the sly while you're really chasing the Jew doctor's virgin daughter. Jackoff is new money tainted with the brashness of faux accomplishment who will struggle his whole life to get his son married at the country club. Shit. He's Rodney friggin' Dangerfield (sorry, Rodney but this is working for me now).

I kinda feel sorry for Jack. Two years ago, he could do no wrong and everyone wanted to break bread with him at Signatures so long as he was paying the tab and giving out free green fees at St. Andrews. Now, he's back to being the lowlife they always thought him to be. That's a pretty sad state of affairs for a guy whose business it was to be the prettiest belle of the ball.

Maybe he will be in prison. I hear they like boys with purty mouths.