It's A Giant Load of Crap
Okay, I haven't updated in a while. Honestly, I have been swamped, but I have also not wanted to enter the bullshit fray about Terry "The Turnip" Schiavo, the Pope or the fucking gas prices. I am generally sick of all that shit. I am also tired of the god damn American-fucking-dream. It's a giant load of crap.
So, here I am- 32 years old (thanks to a recent birthday), a lawyer, married, living in middle class hell. The contractor wants $3500 for repairs on a house I do not own, my husband doesn't even want to acknowledge my feelings of neglect and most of my good friends have got better things to do than listen to my sorry shit. (You can stop reading now if you want). I hate my fucking life. Ten years ago, I was young, in school, in shape and getting laid like a champ. Where did I go wrong???
I can tell you- I bought into that bullshit about having a career and getting married. (Kids- if you are still reading DON'T DO IT!!!) IMHO people should desist in the following:
1. Working at anything that doesn't get them completely jazzed up in the morning or causes them nightmares.
2. Having relationships with anyone who doesn't show them equal respect for their feelings or their other needs.
3. Paying for dumbasses to drink on their tabs, eat their food, read their books, generally treat them like shit.
4. Not asking for what they want.
5. Being embarassed for having any the above needs.
If you know me personally- do not call me. If you are worried about me at this point and want to commit me to the local mental institution- fuck off and stay far, far away because I am apt to kick you hard in your tiny ass testicles. Leave me alone for a day or two while I figure out whether I am killing someone or just crawling up into a small ball in the closet.
I'm finally having enough. I should be in freakin' Kentucky drinking my ass off with Waveline and friends but I am here- up to my neck in responsibility and bullshit. I hate everyone today.
P.S. Bill Frist, you are a giant cocksucker and I hope you fucking rot in hell. Seriously.
So, here I am- 32 years old (thanks to a recent birthday), a lawyer, married, living in middle class hell. The contractor wants $3500 for repairs on a house I do not own, my husband doesn't even want to acknowledge my feelings of neglect and most of my good friends have got better things to do than listen to my sorry shit. (You can stop reading now if you want). I hate my fucking life. Ten years ago, I was young, in school, in shape and getting laid like a champ. Where did I go wrong???
I can tell you- I bought into that bullshit about having a career and getting married. (Kids- if you are still reading DON'T DO IT!!!) IMHO people should desist in the following:
1. Working at anything that doesn't get them completely jazzed up in the morning or causes them nightmares.
2. Having relationships with anyone who doesn't show them equal respect for their feelings or their other needs.
3. Paying for dumbasses to drink on their tabs, eat their food, read their books, generally treat them like shit.
4. Not asking for what they want.
5. Being embarassed for having any the above needs.
If you know me personally- do not call me. If you are worried about me at this point and want to commit me to the local mental institution- fuck off and stay far, far away because I am apt to kick you hard in your tiny ass testicles. Leave me alone for a day or two while I figure out whether I am killing someone or just crawling up into a small ball in the closet.
I'm finally having enough. I should be in freakin' Kentucky drinking my ass off with Waveline and friends but I am here- up to my neck in responsibility and bullshit. I hate everyone today.
P.S. Bill Frist, you are a giant cocksucker and I hope you fucking rot in hell. Seriously.
posted by The Raving Badger at 11:12 AM
3 Comments:
Sending you a big hug.. but wearing a cup.... Wonderdog
Finally! Someone who feels the same way I do! We are different in the respect that I am only 29 and I am not married or have kids (Thanks to my dumbass fiancee who left me 2 days after I miscarried our first child in the second trimester and 2 weeks before the wedding we had been planning for almost a year...but I am not bitter or anything!).
I am an attorney (as you know) and I am dealing with the same bullshit and the same feelings. I am dealing with the low pay, the high student loans, the being out of shape because you are to fucking busy to take care of yourself and the complete disrespect from men who claim to care about me. I don't get laid on a regular basis either because I am tired of putting up with MEN's SHIT Ugggh.
Anyway...my point....I feel you. I can't imagine what it would be like to add kids and a neglectful husband on top of that!
My post was generated mostly from feeling like (as I described to one person today) a humpback whale calf being attacked by a pod of killer whales. Everyone takes and takes and takes. A chunk at a time.
I've been toying with the idea of kids and the husband and I have ceased trying recently at my request. That day I blew up and wrote that post I discovered why. I just don't think I can handle one more responsibility. On some days, I can barely handle myself.
Oh, and your ex- he deserves a big fat kick in his itty bitty balls.
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